[VandaleIndustries]

Couple bar jokes:

A string walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry we don't serve strings here."

He comes back the next day, and the bartender kicks him right back out. This angers the string and he goes outside and works himself into a frenzy. He returns all twisted, with his hair all over the place.

The bartender asks, "Hey aren't you that same string I just threw outta here?"

"No," replied the string, "I'm a frayed knot!"





A duck walks into a bar, "Hey, you got any nuts." The bartender replied NO, and we don't serve ducks in here, get out!

The duck comes right back, "Got any nuts," Bartender says, "NO and we don't serve ducks here, get the hell outta here!"

The duck comes RIGHT back and says, "Hey, got any nuts?" The bartender is really pissed off by then and replies, "NO for the last time, if you come back I'm going to nail your fucking bill to the damned bar, now get outta here!"

The duck returns yet again, "Hey, you got any nails?" The bartender looks confused, but replies, "No...."

"GOOD," replied the duck, "then do you have any nuts?"