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roary
06-04-2004, 08:06 PM
There really aren't any yankee fans that post here, so we can't have any fights! But hey, I can't complain, the fewer yankee fans the better in my opinion. But a good flame war can't hurt either, dontcha think?

yawkeyway
06-04-2004, 08:15 PM
Can't complain really. MFY fans tend to get annoying with their "wait till the playoffs" shit. It'd be fun to gang up on one or two of them though..

Old Hoss
06-05-2004, 05:03 AM
Here's something for any Yankee fan who may appear in the dark of night:

On a tour of Florida, the Pope took a couple of days off to visit the coast for some sightseeing. He was cruising along the beach in the Popemobile when there was a frantic commotion just off shore. A helpless man, wearing a pinstriped Yankees jersey, was struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 25-foot white shark.

As the Pope watched, horrified, a speedboat came racing up with three men wearing Boston Red Sox jerseys aboard. One quickly fired a harpoon into the shark's side. The other two reached out and pulled the bleeding, semi-conscious Yankee fan from the water. Then using baseball bats, the three heroes in red beat the shark to death and hauled it into the boat.

Immediately the Pope shouted and summoned them to the beach. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions," he told them. "I heard that there was some bitter hatred between Red Sox and Yankee fans, but now I have seen with my own eyes that this is not the truth."

As the Pope drove off, the harpooner asked his buddies "Who was that?"

"It was the Pope," one replied. "He is in direct contact with God and has access to all of God's wisdom."

"Well," the harpooner said, "he may have access to God's wisdom, but he doesn't know sh*t about shark fishing... How's the bait holding up?"

YanksHater213
06-05-2004, 05:32 AM
lol

yeszir
06-05-2004, 09:26 AM
Hahahaha. I havent heard that one before.

Yanks Own
06-26-2004, 09:28 PM
let the war begin :D

empirestrikesback26
08-06-2004, 07:35 PM
yankee fan here, uh is that pope joke supposed to be funny in that no bosox fans know who the pope is? despite most being irish catholics?

CrespoBlows
08-06-2004, 07:55 PM
Yea, but if it makes you feel any better you can enter any other things for the yankee fan. (Gays, Iraqis, etc)

empirestrikesback26
08-06-2004, 08:02 PM
? I'm not saying there's anything wrong with irish catholics. I'm an irish catholic myself.

yeszir
08-06-2004, 09:01 PM
The joke is that the sox fans were using the yankee fan as bait for shark fishing.

CrespoBlows
08-06-2004, 09:02 PM
It was funny too :D I waws just pointing out you could insert other things in their as well.

empirestrikesback26
08-06-2004, 09:19 PM
oh aight, uh i guess it would be funny if i was a bosox fan.

empirestrikesback26
08-13-2004, 02:43 PM
On a tour of Florida, the Pope took a couple of days off to visit the coast for some sightseeing. He was cruising along the beach in the Popemobile when there was a frantic commotion just off shore. A helpless man, wearing a pinstriped Yankees jersey, was struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 25-foot white shark.

As the Pope watched, horrified, a speedboat came racing up with three men wearing Boston Red Sox jerseys aboard. One quickly fired a harpoon into the shark's side. The other two reached out and pulled the bleeding, semi-conscious Yankee fan from the water. Then using baseball bats, the three heroes in red beat the shark to death and hauled it into the boat.

Immediately the Pope shouted and summoned them to the beach. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions," he told them. "I heard that there was some bitter hatred between Red Sox and Yankee fans, but now I have seen with my own eyes that this is not the truth."

As the Pope drove off, the harpooner asked his buddies "Who was that?"

"It was the Pope," one replied. "He is in direct contact with God and has access to all of God's wisdom."

"Well," the harpooner said, "he may have access to God's wisdom, but he doesn't know sh*t about shark fishing... How's the bait holding up?" so you got jokes, well i got some too...

empirestrikesback26
08-13-2004, 02:45 PM
"A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is a Boston Red Sox fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they were Red Sox fans, too. Not really knowing what a Red Sox fan was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. There is, however, one exception. A girl named Lucy has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. "Because I'm not a Red Sox fan." "Then," asks the teacher, "what are you?" "Why I'm proud to be a Yankees fan.", boasts the little girl. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Lucy why she is a Yankees fan. "Well, My Dad and Mom are Yankees fans, and I'm a Yankees fan, too!" The teacher is now angry. "That's no reason," she says loudly. "What if your mom was a mor/on, and your dad was a mor/on, What would you be then?" A pause, and a smile. "Then," says Lucy, "I'd be a Red Sox fan."-preview...more later

schillingouttheks
08-13-2004, 03:17 PM
ok one, a joke very similar to that, actually the exact same thing ive heard many times except it was the yankee fan being a moron. two, that same joke used to be my damn signature.

empirestrikesback26
08-13-2004, 03:19 PM
well i probably wasnt here when it was...i have more if you want to hear them.

schillingouttheks
08-13-2004, 03:19 PM
go ahead...its all in good fun :lol:

empirestrikesback26
08-13-2004, 03:22 PM
"Albert Einstein arrives at a party and introduces himself to the first person he sees and asks, "What is your IQ?"
The man answers, "241."
"That is wonderful!" says Albert. "We will talk about the Grand Unification Theory and the mysteries of the universe. We will have much to discuss!"
Next, Albert introduces himself to a woman and asks, "What is your IQ?"
The lady answers, "144."
"That is great!", says Albert, "We can discuss politics and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!".
Albert then goes to another person and asks, "What is your IQ?"
The person answers, "51."
Albert pondered what he could talk about with the preson and then smiles and says,
"GO RED SOX"!! I might add,kinda rude to go up to people and just ask their IQ.

schillingouttheks
08-13-2004, 03:28 PM
ok but is it possible to have a joke where its not possible to substitute things for things? like if there are jokes based on history then those cant be changed.

empirestrikesback26
08-13-2004, 04:24 PM
can do...
Q: What do Trot Nixon and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They both wear a glove on their right hand for no apparent reason!

Q: Did you hear the news? Bill Buckner tried to kill himself today. He jumped out right in front of a bus.
A: Yeah, but luckily, it went right through his legs!

Q: What do the Red Sox and lawn furniture have in common?
A: They both fold and end up in the cellar after Labor Day!

Q: What is the difference between a Fenway Prak hotdog and a Yankee Stadium hotdog?
A: You can get a Yankee Stadium hotdog in October!

Q: Did you hear that Grady Little is having troubles mowing his lawn?
A: Yeah, he couldn't figure out how to pull the starter!

Q: What do Don Zimmer and Grady Little have in common?
A: Neither one could take out Pedro when he should have!- should i keep going?

CrespoBlows
08-13-2004, 04:44 PM
Originally posted by nomah555@Aug 13 2004, 03:28 PM
ok but is it possible to have a joke where its not possible to substitute things for things? like if there are jokes based on history then those cant be changed.
I've seen that joke both ways

empirestrikesback26
08-13-2004, 04:47 PM
not the question and answer ones...most jokes like that you can do both ways to some degree.

schillingouttheks
08-13-2004, 04:58 PM
maybe its sick humor...but the Q & A im kinda taking a liking too, FYI, the grady little one doesnt piss me off...we figured that one out on our own.

empirestrikesback26
08-13-2004, 05:20 PM
well i actually dont have anymore i just said that for effect.

schillingouttheks
08-13-2004, 05:54 PM
well it worked didnt it? well at least your a "good" yankee fan who doesnt rub stuff in...and i am thankful... :rolleyes:

empirestrikesback26
08-13-2004, 06:19 PM
well it worked didnt it? well at least your a "good" yankee fan who doesnt rub stuff in...and i am thankful... thanks man

aaronfreakinboone
08-14-2004, 02:26 AM
im a good old yankee fan but i jsut wanna have sonme fun lol sorry bout my post beore just wanted to pull some strings.....

123456719181234567
08-14-2004, 01:44 PM
hahaha 1918

YanksHater213
08-14-2004, 04:46 PM
haha, i liked the zimmer one

empirestrikesback26
08-15-2004, 10:56 PM
yea they re alright.

schillingouttheks
08-17-2004, 12:01 AM
Originally posted by 123456719181234567@Aug 14 2004, 01:44 PM
hahaha 1918
perfect bandwagoner...cant think of anything else to say after weve all heard it millions of times...along with 26...we get it.

empirestrikesback26
08-17-2004, 01:44 AM
im proud to say i have never said those numbers here. ;)

schillingouttheks
08-17-2004, 09:26 AM
good and its just the most annoying thing ever...yankee fans who say it know they lose in an argument and that they dont know jackshit and they think it actually gets to us when they say it...we get it assholes.

empirestrikesback26
08-17-2004, 02:27 PM
both fans revert to saying the same basic thing after losing an arguement. Yanks say 1918, red sox fans say well you have biggest payroll. I dont know which one annoys me more.

CrespoBlows
08-17-2004, 04:22 PM
Originally posted by empirestrikesback26@Aug 17 2004, 03:27 PM
both fans revert to saying the same basic thing after losing an arguement. Yanks say 1918, red sox fans say well you have biggest payroll. I dont know which one annoys me more.
It doesn't bother me anymore, as it used to. I just smile and nod, and then go on with my business. As for the payroll arguement, it's the reason the Yankees win, but there's nothing against the rules in baseball saying there is.

empirestrikesback26
08-17-2004, 04:29 PM
Biggest payroll doesnt mean you always win, look at the knicks, biggest payroll in the NBA nad they barley make the palyoffs every year.

CrespoBlows
08-17-2004, 06:20 PM
Giving 13 million to Othello Harrington isn't same as giving 13 million to Bernie Williams, and if you didn't have payroll you wouldn't do as good.

schillingouttheks
08-17-2004, 09:38 PM
the only thing about the payroll is that its almost a dis to us, considering, i think, we have the second highest payroll, yet we keep losing to teams who dont have one as big...if u think about it, we should make the ALCS every year if you go by the payroll thing, meaning it should be redsox yankees ALCS EVERY YEAR. but it just proves that the argument means nothing because thats not the case, and as many times as the yankees do make the ALCS, they dont always win the WS...as we see in 2001, '02, '03...payroll means nothing. we just get upset because when we realize it, redsox fans just DONT have a comeback to the yankees, because they DO win, and thats the fact. we just have to realize it and move on.

schillingouttheks
08-17-2004, 09:41 PM
Originally posted by empirestrikesback26@Aug 17 2004, 02:27 PM
both fans revert to saying the same basic thing after losing an arguement. Yanks say 1918, red sox fans say well you have biggest payroll. I dont know which one annoys me more.
also, 1918 is more important because its factual and it does mean something. and unfortunately, its true, we just dont want to realize it because we love the team so much, but if we put the feelings aside and we look at it from another team's perspective, it is true, the red sox havent won a WS since 1918, 86 freaking years. (85 because this WS hasnt come yet.)

empirestrikesback26
08-17-2004, 11:08 PM
Originally posted by CrespoBlows@Aug 17 2004, 07:20 PM
Giving 13 million to Othello Harrington isn't same as giving 13 million to Bernie Williams, and if you didn't have payroll you wouldn't do as good.
Thats why the yankee are better than the knicks, they know how to handle money. 1918, i mean yankee fans can say it, its just dumb, you know you 've lost an arguement. Stating the only reason the yanks win a lot is because of a high pay roll is not justified. Its half the reason, not the whole reason. The other half is having a good manager, and knowing not to make a idiotic trade. Therefore a good general manager, not the best, but right up there with the best.

schillingouttheks
08-17-2004, 11:33 PM
so basically what i wrote...except i didnt say the manager part...

empirestrikesback26
08-18-2004, 01:06 AM
well as I see it, that might be the most important part.

CrespoBlows
08-18-2004, 05:44 AM
That's correct, I believe the Sox shouldn't complain about the payroll at all. It's like Bill Simmons said "Does anyone care if the guy with the 11 inch dick, is complaing that the guy with the 13 inch dick is getting more work than he is?"

schillingouttheks
08-18-2004, 03:19 PM
right.

empire, i said that we shouldnt say payroll either because we too pay almost as much as the yankees, and by telling the yankees they win because of it, we have the second highest, and we should be on pace with the yankees every year. in an argument to put someone down it doesnt work no matter which side says "u have a higher payroll." but it is the most important thing...u jsut cant put someone down with it.

empirestrikesback26
08-18-2004, 05:24 PM
Exactly.

yankeehater
09-17-2004, 09:36 PM
u yankee fans have no good comebacks except for 1918 or sumtin stupid :angry:

empirestrikesback26
09-18-2004, 11:53 AM
and what do you have? highest payroll? Considering you have the second highest doesn't really make your comeback any better. Plus most non bandwagoners don't say 1918.

yankeehater
09-18-2004, 04:46 PM
sureeeee cough liar cough :P

empirestrikesback26
09-18-2004, 04:54 PM
What am I lying about? THe fact that you have the second highest payroll? Sorry, I'm not lying.

yankeehater
09-18-2004, 05:06 PM
who cares about the payroll :shrug:

empirestrikesback26
09-18-2004, 05:07 PM
Sox fans.

yankeehater
09-18-2004, 05:17 PM
so u guys cheat, what can we do about it :shrug:

Bren25x
09-18-2004, 05:56 PM
keyword second highest u fool

empirestrikesback26
09-18-2004, 06:18 PM
Originally posted by yankeehater@Sep 18 2004, 06:17 PM
so u guys cheat, what can we do about it :shrug:
Oh we cheat huh? And how do we do that?

empirestrikesback26
09-18-2004, 06:19 PM
Originally posted by Bren25x@Sep 18 2004, 06:56 PM
keyword second highest u fool
exactly, not third, not forth, second.

Bren25x
09-18-2004, 07:48 PM
yeah meaning a distant second to your team

empirestrikesback26
09-18-2004, 07:50 PM
It's not that distant. Plus look at the mets, they have a high payroll and look at them. Managing is the most important, not money.

Bren25x
09-18-2004, 07:52 PM
no 60 million dollars is pretty distant if u ask me. and the next highest team is 30 million under the red sox...so i cant complain that much but 60 million is more than atleast 1/3 of the teams in MLB

empirestrikesback26
09-18-2004, 07:59 PM
Thats one player, two players. It's not a huge difference. It's all realtive. In baseball 60(it's really 50) isn't that much.

Bren25x
09-18-2004, 11:33 PM
Its 2 players worth 30 million dollars a year...you are on crack nobody in the game is making 30 million a year, let alone 2 people. a payroll accounts for one season

Bren25x
09-18-2004, 11:35 PM
and i dont care what you say in response i know you are going to come up with something stupid to say that doesnt make sense, (like 2 players mkaing a combined 60 million dollars and not being a lot toward a payroll) but the Yankees do not have a limit...the red sox do...its simple...dont tell me that the red sox could spend like the yankees too...130 million is pushing it for the red sox...you guys are at 190+ right now..

yankeehater
09-19-2004, 07:53 AM
with 60 million more to spend we could sihn all our FA's and sign beltran

Yankeefan04
09-19-2004, 08:10 AM
Originally posted by yankeehater@Sep 19 2004, 07:53 AM
with 60 million more to spend we could sihn all our FA's and sign beltran
Beltran is coming to the Yankees buddy.

yankeehater
09-19-2004, 08:15 AM
u wish...dream on

empirestrikesback26
09-19-2004, 01:26 PM
Lol, a sox fan who doesnt think beltran is next years CF?wow